Many people choose court marriage thinking it stops cheating or guarantees 50/50 sharing. Wrong! Separation does NOT end it, returning bride price does NOT end it, tearing certificate does NOT end it. Only High Court can dissolve it. Remarrying before divorce = bigamy. Read before you say I do.
THINGS NOBODY TELLS YOU ABOUT STATUTORY MARRIAGE UNTIL PROBLEMS ARISE!
Many people choose statutory marriage - what most people call court marriage - because they believe it prevents their spouse from marrying another wife/husband or guarantees an automatic 50/50 sharing of property if the marriage ends.
But what happens when the marriage fails?
Can you simply pack your things and walk away? Does returning the bride price end the marriage?
Here are some things you should know BEFORE saying "I do."
1. DIVORCE IS NOT AS EASY AS GETTING MARRIED
You may get married in one day, but ending the marriage requires court proceedings, lawyers and filing fees. It can take months or even years.
Statutory marriage is a marriage under the Marriage Act. You cannot just say "I am tired" and walk away. You must file a Petition for Dissolution of Marriage in the High Court, prove your ground for divorce - e.g. adultery, desertion, cruelty, irretrievable breakdown - and wait for the court to dissolve it.
Many people are shocked when they hear lawyer fees and court time. That is why you must think well before you sign that certificate.
2. SEPARATION DOES NOT END THE MARRIAGE
You may move out, stop talking, block each other, or live apart for 5 years, 10 years, even 20 years. You are STILL legally married until the marriage is dissolved by a court.
Separation is not divorce. Living apart is not divorce. Sleeping in different houses is not divorce.
As long as the court has not dissolved it, you are still husband and wife in the eyes of the law - with all the rights and duties that come with it.
3. RETURNING THE BRIDE PRICE DOES NOT END A STATUTORY MARRIAGE
No family meeting, traditional ceremony, or return of bride price can replace the legal process.
This is where many families make a big mistake. They gather elders, return bride price, pour libation, and declare "marriage has ended."
In customary marriage, that may have effect. In STATUTORY marriage, it has NO legal effect. Your marriage is still valid. Your certificate is still valid. You are still married.
Bride price is a customary matter. Statutory marriage is a legal matter under the Marriage Act. One cannot cancel the other.
4. TEARING YOUR MARRIAGE CERTIFICATE DOES NOT DISSOLVE YOUR MARRIAGE
You can tear it, burn it, or throw it away, but the marriage remains legally valid until a court dissolves it.
The certificate is just EVIDENCE of the marriage. The marriage itself is recorded at the Registry. Tearing the paper does not tear the record. You can even go back to the Registry and get a Certified True Copy.
So don't tear certificate in anger and think you are free. You are still married.
5. ONLY A HIGH COURT CAN DISSOLVE A STATUTORY MARRIAGE IN NIGERIA
Only a High Court of a State or the High Court of the FCT has jurisdiction to dissolve a statutory marriage in Nigeria.
You cannot simply walk into a Magistrate Court or settle the matter at a family meeting and expect your marriage to be legally dissolved.
If a Magistrate Court or family meeting "divorces" you, that divorce is NOT valid in law for statutory marriage. You will still be married.
6. YOU CANNOT SIMPLY MARRY SOMEONE ELSE
Until the existing marriage is legally dissolved, marrying another person can expose you to serious legal consequences, including BIGAMY.
Bigamy is a criminal offence in Nigeria - marrying another person while still legally married to someone else.
Many men and women have entered second marriage while still legally married to the first, thinking "we have separated since" or "her family returned bride price." That second marriage is void, and they can be prosecuted.
If you want to remarry, FIRST go and get a Decree Absolute from the High Court. Don't risk prison for impatience.
7. THERE IS NO AUTOMATIC 50/50 SHARING OF PROPERTY
Getting married under the Act does not mean that everything acquired during the marriage will automatically be divided equally when you divorce.
This is the biggest lie many people believe.
In Nigeria, there is NO automatic 50/50 rule. The court will look at:
- Who bought the property?
- Whose name is on the documents?
- Who contributed - money, labour, care, support?
- What is fair and just in the circumstances?
If your husband bought land in his name alone and you cannot prove contribution, you may not get half. If your wife bought house in her name and you cannot prove contribution, you may not get half.
That is why it is important to keep receipts, keep proof of contribution, and have agreements in writing. Don't assume "we are married, so it's 50/50."
8. HAVING CHILDREN MEANS LIFELONG RESPONSIBILITIES
Even after divorce, both parents remain responsible for their children. Issues of custody, access and maintenance must be addressed in the best interests of the children.
Divorce ends marriage, it does NOT end fatherhood or motherhood.
The court will decide custody based on the BEST INTEREST of the child - not who is richer, not who shouts loudest. The other parent will have right of access. Both parents must contribute to school fees, feeding, medicals, etc.
Using children as weapon - "you will not see your children again" - can work against you in court.
9. YOUR SPOUSE MAY HAVE RIGHTS TO YOUR ESTATE
If you die without a Will, your surviving spouse may have legal rights in the administration and distribution of your estate.
Even if you are separated for 10 years, if you are still legally married and you die without a Will, your spouse can claim under the law of administration of estates.
This is why after separation, you MUST do two things:
1. File for divorce properly
2. Write a Will - and update it after divorce
Don't leave your estate to chance and family wahala.
CONCLUSION: THINK BEFORE YOU SIGN
Statutory marriage is beautiful. It gives you legal protection. But it also gives you legal duties.
Before you say "I do" in court:
- Understand that it is not easy to end
- Understand that separation is not divorce
- Understand that bride price return does not end it
- Understand that you cannot remarry until court dissolves it
- Understand that 50/50 is not automatic
If you are already in statutory marriage and having problems, don't just pack and go and marry another person. Talk to a lawyer. File properly. Get your Decree Absolute.
Share this to someone about to do court marriage. You may save them from a big mistake tomorrow.
Have you seen someone who thought separation ended their marriage? Drop your experience in comments - but please, no names, respect privacy.
This report originally appeared on Imo Media Hub - www.imomediahub.org
Disclaimer: This article is for general information only, not legal advice. For your specific case, consult a qualified family lawyer in your state.
